feelings of a night

tml's the last day of 2008..
i have no idea where to go tml..

feel lonely somehow... n i dunno y... or maybe i know y but i cant get the feeling into words.

i dont like to be in the messy crowd, with everyone pushing each other and sweats all over, tried that once in tmn counnought's pasar malam and that gave me some nightmare.. haha..

wat i feel like to do right now is... to get in a really nice car, roll down the windows, and go race in the empty highway. with the bombing musics around me, and the icy cold wind blowing on my face.. wow.. that'll feel absolutely FUN!!

wat i'd like to spend in tml's night would be sumthing fun, but not in the crowd plz.. it kinda get on my nerves.. sumthing like a party at sum1's house, or spending in a ktv would be nice. ppl'll get crazy in there. =p

anyway, lets hope there'll be a fun day tml. =)

cheers~

~ jess ~
1.14am

christmas~

its finally christamas~~!!! hohoho~~!! too bad santa din appear.. ishh... wat i meant was, parents din buy xmas present for me.. T-T

but at least i earned atreat today!! =) my big bro n sis promised to celebrate at chillies, midvalley. we went out at about 1pm+++, then when we were stucked in the car for 2hours.... compared with the usual time length, tiz time is so kua zhang. normally i can reach there by around 10mins... lol... look wat xmas gave us, traffic jam.. @.@

well we ate there, dishes were just fine, service was like hardly okay.... n i ate till my stomach nearly burst.. hahax. the juices could be refilled, n i drank 3 glasses of mango juice... woah.. big record for me.=p

ohya, watched IP man during xmas eve with family again. it was so so so nice!!! the oni prob would be, when we watched till the gan jiong part, the screen suddenly black out, n the audiences in the room all went 'wooooooooooooooo!!' hahaha.. some even scolded foul words. =p can c how anxious the ppl are.. hahahahaha.. waited more than 5min for the screen to reappear... grrrr... leisure mall de cinema so cacat... grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr...

well then, here's alate xmas wish for all
merry belated xmas!!! =)

~ jess ~
2.09am

tagged again..

tagged by : Dear Mr. Nicholas Tan (again -.-)

Rules & Regulations:

- do not copy answers
- the tag questions must be 100% the same
- tag people before doing tag
I tag
1. Gim Kiang
2. Joan
3. Mabel
4. Hui Yi
5. Cally
6. Vickie
7. Yion
8. Nic Chow
9. Gene

How you know 1? ( Gim Kiang)
- Well, my friend introduced him, and that was when im in form 1, which i was still new to the secondary skul. n i barely know anyone by then. but we only got close in form 2, which is when we studied in the same classroom. =)


What would you do if you never meet 2? (Joan)
- then i think i'll miss one really special n nice friend, but luckily i met her!! =)


What would you do if 3 and 4 dated you? (mabel + huiyi)
- hahahaha... welll.. honestly, mabel was my lao o for quite a long time, but since we 'divorced' so many times... then im done with her.. hahahahah.. she's my jimui!! so i'll join her if she dated me. =p n the same goes to my hui yi.. kekeke


Would 5 and 6 make a good couple? (cally + vickie)
HAHAHAHAHHAA... they will if they are less, but they are not, too bad.. =p


Do you think 7 is attractive? (yion)
for sure she is attrative, or else y r there so many guys after her?? =D


Tell me something about 9 (Gene)
Gene is a boy. he's currently studying in sunway uni. he was in the same high school with me, that's how we met. n then... he wears lens often, fluent eng, smart, high social skills, n flower heart! =p


What's 1 favourite past time? (gim Kiang)
haha... watching drama, sleeping, hanging out with frens. but now, maybe he'll be packed with works n studies.. kekekeke...


What language does 2 speaks? (joan)
well, she's eng educated, but she does know how to speak chinese. so... it depends on who's she speakin to lor... sometimes chinese n the others english. =)


Who is 3 going out with? (mabel)
hmm.. she's not going out with any 'specific' person yet, but we're gonna hang out tml~ yay~


How old is 4? (huiyi)
she's 18 years old. =)


When was the last time you talked to 5? (cally)
hahaha.... the last time eh??? it was on the phone... ummm... around 2weeks ago. =)


Who is 6 favourite singer? (vickie)
ohh... this is so so so easy... its LAM FONG!!!!! hahahahah


Would you date 7? (yion)
hehe... she's going out with some1 ledi... so too bad.. hahahahahahahaha


Is 8 single? (nic chow)
yes indeed, people, u can go for him!!! =D


What's 9 last name? (Gene)
Liew.


Would you consider being in a relationship with 1? (gim kiang)
woah... tis's a tough question... but since he's already fell for some1, i better not kacau. =)


Which school does 2 go to? (joan)
errrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr....
for now its segi subang jaya.. =)


What do you like about 3? (mabel)
kekekeke... ALOT!~!!
caring la, always there by ur side, chat-able, ngam key, kind, she loves kids, blablabalablabla.. =)

~ jess ~
1.47am

piaaaaaaaaanooooooooo

had just browsed through youtube, checking out different versions of how 'take a bow' is played. really salute those ppl, especially david sides, being so super duper talented. each n every of his songs are AWESOME!!! even learned how to play take a bow from him. =p

wanting to learn how to play apologize for a long long time... but when i saw the piano sheet, i was like... wat the heck.... without pressing the piano keys i already gave up. >.< so pray i'll get to learn how to play through youtube bah.. haha

next, im so so worried bout my piano exam nx year, coz last time when i listen to the songs, i just picked to play those which the melodies i can accept, n i picked it juz by listening from the cd. since some classical songs really are..... abit weird.. >.<

and then when i was listening to those songs again, i felt really really stressed.. those fast fingerings r so so so so fast tht i dont think i can do it even if i practise it for a long long time. both the notes and the tempo is really too much for me.. sigh.. dont noe if i can do it.. dunwanna fail my last time err... =(

signing out.

~ jess ~

busy days..

been very busy these few weeks.. although im in holiday, n finally finished my horrible finals, but still alot to do.

1st) 12th dec, we have the fayette house programmes going on, have to do the ceremony for the president from university of U.S., that they came to our college to check out our club.

2nd) 14th dec, its the Din's list ceremony together with the convocation of the graduates of adp.. which was located in prince hotel =) spent time on it. yet it went well n was fun!! =3 wat i rmb was... my dear senior, miss elaine, cried till her eyes bengkak, all puffy n red, her specs were soaked with tears when we sang her 'peng you'. =p took some pictures of it, but i dun dare to show it in public.. hahaha.. well i'll truly miss her. >.<

when those are finally finished, i dont have to go college anymore, which is so so so far from my house. @.@ nx up, will be my bro's wedding dinner.

3rd) 20th dec, bro's wedding dinner along his wife's relatives n frenz... which is tml.. >.<

4th) 26th dec, preparing for the dinner which we chinese normally will have before we are married, so called the party of the last day of single life. hahaha.. gonna be so bz tht day.. >.<

5th) 27th dec, bro's wedding dinner along with our side of relatives n frens. hmmm... this will be much bzier than the day before i think... >.<

well guys, as i'd stated out, now u all faham y i cant go out so often liao gua... so its not i dunwanna go hang out, but i really have many things to do.. as a responsible sister(ehemmm).. so i'll meet up with u all rite after 27th alrite??? n the christmas overnight i dunno i can make it anot.. =( wish me luck la.

ciaoz

~ jess ~

take a bow - Rihanna

miss jess playing the WHITE GRAND PIANO!!!
wakakkakakakakaka
how i wish i own that piano... >.<

a child playing piano

some introduction should be given. ehemm....
okay...
there's this cute little gurl playing n singing 'quiet' .
enjoy!!!

"An Jing" (jay chou)

tagged

tagged by : Dear Mr. Nicholas Tan

The rules:
-Link to your tagger and post these rules.

*List 8 random facts about yourself and tag 8 people.

1. tall
2. thin
3.dark
4. funny
5. sampat
6. friendly!!!
7. playful
8. laughs loudly

1. Mabel
2. Cally
3. Yion
4. Nicholas Chow
5. Ilex
6. Vickie
7. Eu gene
8. Chee Fei

*YOU
-Name: Yu Hui Lim (jess)
-Name you wish you had: satisfied with my wonderful name =)
-What do people normally your name as: ika, fishtail(in chinese)
-Birthday: 2nd Mac
-Bitrhplace: KL
-Time of birth: around midnight if not mistaken
-Single or taken: single n available!
-Zodiac sign: Pisces


*YOUR APPEARANCE
-H0w tall are you: 174cm
-Wish you were taller: NOT AT ALL!!
-Eye colour: black
-Current hair color: black.. =(
-Short or long hair: short
-Ever dye your hair a bizarre color: no..
-Last time you did something dramatic with you hair: dye it red but turn out black... =.=
-Glasses or contact: glasses for now
-Do you were make up: depends on the occasion
-Paint your nails: yeap~

*In a opposite gender
-What color eye: blue? =p
-What color hair: anything.. as long as its nice
-Shy or outgoing: outgoing la...
-Serious or fun: i need both...
-Older or younger than you: older will be better
-A turn on: ??
-A turn off: ??

*This and That
-Flowers or chocolates: choco!!! but if there's both its even better. =p
-Pepsi or coke: pepsi, coke has too much of gas
-Rap or rock: rock
-Relationship or one night stand: relationship...
-School or work: school (duh)
-Love or money: i need both to survive
-Movie or music: more to movies
-Country or city: city life is great!
-Sunny or rainy days: do u have to be this extreme? cant i choose moderate??
-Friends or family: i need both... y r u forcing me..???? T-T

*Have you ever
-Lie: honestly, YES!!!
-Stole something: umm... tht's when i was way way small... =p
-Smoked: N O T E V E R
-Hurt someone close to you: uhh.... yeah... =(
-Broke someone's heart: think so..
-Had you heart broken: for sure
-Wonder what was wrong with you: when i was small small small
-Wish you were prince or princess: again, when i was small small small
-Like someone who was taken: nopz
-Shaved your head: no way!!!
-Used chopstick: im a chinese!!
-Sang in the mirror to yourself: =p yeapz

*Favorites
-Flower: some white color flowers. duno wat name
-Candy: the christmas cane candy. with red n white stripes on it!!
-Song: lydia, ni zui jing hai hao ma, blablablabla
-Scent: not too heavy ones
-Color: not specialized
-Movie: twilight!!!!!!
-Singer: jerry yan!!!
-Junk food: each n every one!!!
-Website: facebook frenzter n blog
-Location: own bedroom?
-Animal: spikey!!!
-Ever cried over someone: hell yes
-Is there anything you wish you could change about yourself: alot!!!
-Do you think you're attractive: not gonna say anything.
-If you had to choose a fairytale as your life what would you choose: umm... cinderella?? =p
-Do you play any sports: yeap!! badminton!!!

moody finals

as usual, its time for finals, n as usual, i'll have to study kao kao... sleeping late, eyes locking on the textbook, tension, stressed, no entertainments.. blablabla

everyone seems busy, no more playing basketball, no more hanging out... there's just books books and books.. ( its kinda like my fault actually lol) well guys, im quite guilty for going bak home so early these few days.. but the finals r really driving me insane.. scheduled myself to finish 3 chapters within a day, but what turns out was i could only finish 10 pages... wth?!?!

realized that my time will not be enough, and i cannot get anything lower than B... which means i'll have to score at least 80% for every subject.. T-T fell like banging the wall.... how come i never had this kinda feeling in the 1st sem???? i feel like i will fail each n every subject.. all the subs i took this sem was alll new things in my life.. eco, accounting, marketing, management n intercultural communication.

well coz i've nvr paid much attention in class, it makes me feel like, wat had i learn this sem??? 3months of classes is like... all in a blank memory.. a fren asked me to teach him marketing (in a diff college) and i answered him, i have no idea wat marketing is all about. felt ashamed with my stupid answer.. its like i've wasted all the time n money i spent for class..

what i promised to myself is, i'll have to be a hardworking student nx sem. there will not be any last minutes assignments, studies n so on. but also i wanna live college life to the max!! arghh... what for a bookworm with books but not laughs??? its like a puppet with books, being souless n empty. can the words from the textbooks help in out career?? i dont noe... but wat i heard from experienced white collars are, working is another start for everything. new colleuges, new boss, new environment n blah blah blah.

but well, what i have to do now is finish my studies. n how can i do that?? by doing well in my finals.. oh well, im jz a typical teenager, procrastinates whenever i get the chance to. =p n by the way, im thinking of buying a new hp. does k660i sounds good?? comments plz. arigatoh

STUDY WITH ALL YOUR MIGHT IN FINALS!!!

signed,
jess

Global Musical Carnival!!!

yesterday was finally THE day!!! been preparing for this day for a long long time. we all reached segi before 8am, set up our booths, decorations, plannings, games, performances rehearsal, n much much more.

there was too many obstacles to face, but we get to solve all of them!! phew!! chee wei, cally, yancy, ilex n me, the china booth's members wore china costume that day, both ilex n chee wei wore samfu, n the rest of us wore cheongsam.. hahaha.. we even asked big tiffany to play the chinese yoyo in front of our booth to attract people, since its one of the china-origin-game. n it was so so so so COOL!!! we cheered for her!! she's really amazing!!! well we got the crowd's attention all right~!! hahahaha

then my other friends r doing the spain booth. gosh, nicholas wore a... spain costume?? hahaha, well to be frank, it looked good on him la, muz praise him liao.. hahaha.. sumore he did the make ups n styled his hair, i was like.. walao yehh!!!! y can he change so much??? hahahaha.. n there's a female spain custome, a red color gown. its really sweet n nice, vickie wore it~~ phewit~!!! nice to the max!!! hahaha..

other than that, miss lettisha wore a dutch custome!!!!! n the shoe of hers, im like WOW!!!! how can ppl wear such shoes.... made of pure wood.. looks really hard to walk, but she din fall.. hehehehe.. she's juz like those who appear on tv, n standing in the middle of the greenish field, with winds blowing on her dress... O.O n there's the japanese kimono's too!!! justin n jean took photo on it, n the scene looked like a married-couple-photograh-session. hehehe..

evonne called to go for make-up session.. lol.. i was sitting there for a very very long time, with layers n layers of 'powders' brushed on my face. sumo cannot move here move there... it was TIRING for juz sitting there.. lol... but stil have to thank the nice n pretty 'hua zhuang shi' oh~ hehehe..

then frens reached segi, really have to show gratitude towards my frens hu supported me!! arigatoh korzaimazz!! there's mabel (the dearest =p), kah ann(more n more lenglui liao), hui yi (the surprised 'gift'), you wei (the supportive fren), seow + eugene + cy (the tricked-me de guys..)

it started off with speeches by datin, n blablabla.. then here comes the performances!! yay!! i waited in the 4th floor for my turn. >.< finally 7pm, n its time to go down. the cheerleaders went 1st ( they were awesome!!!!! great job!!) n finally my turn (i wanted to go before jeremy =p), then here it comes. frenz cheered for me.. so gandong, sumo a banner with my name on it.. hahahahahha.. i din play well ler, with mistakes, n irregular tempo... sniff.. but still my frens cheered for me. arigatoh!! hehehehe.. n finally its over.. phew!! got down the stage n started to relax =p.

went out for dinner with my secondary skul frens, but din eat anything. =p wanted to jimat money(im so broke now T-T) but went back to segi after 10min or so coz i feel guilty.. hehe.. thn helped around, had fun, danced around n blablala

saw the 'man jiang hong' de ppl signing autographes, fren bought the posters juz for them to sign.. lol.. one of the guy even wore sunglasses although its already at NIGHT!! hahaha.. (dunno the name paiseh) n their 'jing1 ji4 ren2' used a paper or sumthing to fan them some air.. LOL

then when the band was playing, our kisiao gang along with dr steven formed a big circle n 'danced' .. hahahahha... n i found out alot of my frens know how to dance, really salute!! hahaha.. the band i liked most among all the others tht nite was the last band. i din take notice wat name was it, but it was so so so awesome!! the performed 3 songs, the 1st 2 songs i think its their own band song, while the last song is 'i dunwanna be' =p SO SO SO AWESOME!!!!!! hehehe... we danced danced n danced~~ lalala~~

n finally its the end of the nite. ms padma gave a speech, as a conclusion for this nite. then we took our group photo, cleaned the place, n went home~~ tht time was already 12am++ phew!!!

went through many things this nite, n of coz learnt many valueble things, n built up strong bonds between friends, n we made memories with our own hands!! hurray!!

~ jess ~

a wednesday

today's the last day of my current holiday. n guess wat?? i broke my record of this year!!! i woke up at 12pm++ hahahhaha.. well maybe this aint much towards others, but to me??? its a miracle!!! (since in so guai n wake up early everyday) =p no offense ya? =p

1st thing tht popped outta my head is to remind myself to take the things from timesquare. then fed myself for breakfast aka lunch n sat down in front of the tv for a long long time till my dad was bak. after that due to my lack of knowledge of roads to timesaquare, my dad guided me to my destination. he sat ont he passanger's seat, n his hand was always at the handbreak's side, getting ready to pull it if anything happens... grrrrrr... that really pissed me off. but i kept it quite, since im still a newbie of driving... =.= the sunlight blazed into my eyes, for ur info, it was 3pm+ in the afternoon, it made me couldnt open up my eyes, n i closed my eyes at every stop, juz to steal moments to relief my eyes.. =(

reached timesquare finally, n went up to the 8th floor, but then wanted to find a fren who's working there, so went up to the 11th floor( which cost me much time) n finally got to met my fren. hahaha. guess wat? we chat for less than 2 min, n ciao-ed. lol... funny rite? hahaha

nx i went back to 8th floor, n entered the shop named make up ur mind. asked for ah feng n he asked me whether am i able to carry it all by myself. my jaw dropped when he showed me the things i have to take away. 5 stacks of wrapped browsers, a stand, and a advertising poster. he cant help me to carry some down coz he's having classes. so.. the 1st person tht popped into my mind is jj!! called him n asked for his help. still feel sorry for disturbing his work.. >.< komenasai... he came down n stared at the stacks of papers. hahahhaa.. well its quite tough to get all of them down by juz the 2 of us. but still.. we managed to do it!! yay!!

halfway to the car n a malay kid offered to help me carry the stand. phew! arigatoh to him which i dunno his name guy. hahax. well really appreciated jj's help, he's like a hero tht rescued me outta no where.. hehehehe... thank u jj!!! =D

n tml will be a back to normal-college-life life.. T-T hope i'll be able to wake up in time tml!! =)
good day~ =)

~ jess ~

short short holiday

it's been a long while since i last blogged. =p well what to do?? u know im such a busy person~ hahahaha.. hmm.. these days.. wat was i doing huh?? im not quite sure.

im given 5days of holidays in a row, n wat i did on the 1st day is.. SLEEP!!! due to being waked up early early in the morning for a week.. its right to gain back your sleepiness when u're at last free. tht's wat teenagers in this era do rite? so im absolutely NORMAL!! hahahah.. next on, actually i cant remember wat i did on saturday.. morning >piano lesson, n the rest.. i really cant recall now.. shit.. my memo is so much worse now.. T-T oh oh!! i got it~~!! i did the gmc slide thingy!! n managed to finish it on the same day!! phew!! hahaha

well i cant remember wat i did on sunday n yesterday, so.... lets skip that. =p today, woke up at 8am.. supposed to sleep till 10am at least, but dunno y i cant sleep T-T (slept too much i guess) then played piano till kao kao lat, from 8am till 11am, kept repeating a few songs. but still cant play them well.. T-T fingers aching, have to stop, n now torturing my fingers again by typing. hehehe.. later im gonna go times square to get some stuff, so scared tht i'll 4get to do tht.. muz bear in mind!! hahaha

by the way i made a 'to-do list' , n sticked it in front of my study table. (but i ignored it right after i sticked it) wat a waste.. hahaha.. i actually planned to finish my management revision, but tht's impossible for me to do ler... 5 days... more than 300 pages... no way.. ahahaha..

i borrowed 2 fiction books from college's library.. but din get to read them.. T0T suppose to returm those books on 28th, but i oni have class on 30th.. haihz.. will kena denda duit again T-T

and and, 1st of nov is the GMC !!! to those who dunno wats that, for ur information, it stands for global musical carnival, which is a charity event (to msia mental health association) done by our intercultural communication class, lead by miss padma, it's also a project given.. lolz... which gives each of us 50% if its done well! hahaha.. hope it'll run smoothly on that day ler!! people!! come support!! help those who r in need when u r able to!! =)

hav a good day~! =)

~ jess ~

so called a day

woke up damn late this morning, was supposed to get up by 7am, but i unconsciously turned off the alarm.. and ended up scrambling outta my room at 8am.. T-T was damn dizzy when i was brushing my teeth, feel like burying myself back into my blanket n continue my dream. but, since im so guai lui, my brain told me to rush to the car n get going. n so did i. T-T

reached college, and went to the wrong floor ( since im not sure where is the class), took the stairs up to 10th floor, n found out the door was LOCKED!! grrrrrrrrrr... walked back to 9th floor, and waited for the always-full-lift. started class, and was supposed to get down with marketing showcase at 11am, but the DEAREST lecturer made us wait at the counter for quite a long time, then ask few of us stay back to listen some meeting thingy, ended up most of us stayed back to the boring n sickening classroom. finally got the wonderful 'class dismiss' phrase, n off we go~!! =D

went taking photos here n there, recording stuff n so on. then helped out with the intercultural thingy, editing the tickets, n blablabla. ohya, got to know the 3rd nicholas in segi. hahaha.. went messing around at the 6th floor again ( i think we disturbed others' classes =p) playing with balloons.. editing a damn yeng de piano song into a funny version XD n blablabla..

went off for basketball later, played few games, the 3 nicholoases teamed up, and here goes nicholas here n nicholas there. =p rained around 6pm n went yumcha to avoid the traffic jaming period. pump petrol alone for the 1st time in my life on the way back, boo!! im home!!! hahaha..

~ jess ~

myself

Seeking myself,
locating myself,
valueing myself,
grading myself,
concluding myself.

will maintain as myself for now.
but seeking for some changes.
let it be the better or worse.
but i hope it'll be the better one.

wish me luck =)

~ jess ~

last paper-day

finally finished the last paper today!!! phew!! what a relief!!! i spent so much time preparing for this paper.. the slides are the only learning object that i can get into hand.. but its just too summarized? n made me dunno how to answer my paper.. T-T i read each questions at least 3 times b4 answering it.. coz i cant even get what are they asking for in the questions... T-T was so feddup doing the paper. went outta the exam hall 25mins later.. had the feeling to bang the wall.. stupid paper... grrrrr..

to release some feddup-ness, i went to 6th floor, but it didnt help much.. T-T after that went swimming at casa, n i ended up drinking water in the pool.. T-T but still, i had a great time in the pool =p splashing water n playing some games.. =p n learning how to swim again.. ( since i terlalu lama din swim =p) n ta da~~ its celebration time!!

celebrated jojo n jean's burfday, rachel made a cake for them, and presents, and photo shooting, and DINNER!! hahaha.. went macau restaurant, n yion's bf drop by~ finally get to c him =p

then we walked back to casa, n someone was robbed just behind us!!! >.<>.<

anyway, got home before 10pm, and here i am!!! =)

day of relaxation~ cheers~

~ jess ~

1st day of midterm-week

surprisingly, i managed to finished my macro textbook at around 3am =p then i got up at 7am ( i oni slept for less than 4hours... T-T) to get ready for the day. there was no traffic jam blocking my way today!! what a good start!! =) then reached college, met my friends, went off searching for a suitable place for our last revisions. cafe was too noisy n smelly, library was way too warm (the air-cond went off @.@) , then we ended up sneaking into an empty classroom. spent the whole morning there discussing n reading, n had lunch at McD!!!! =D

after having the LONG lunch, its already near to the exam-time. victor had so much confident n said he'll get out of the hall no more than 15minutes. if he fails, he'll treat me n nick ice cream!!! =) n guess what?? he dint get outta the hall in time after all!! so here i come, ice cream!!! hurray~~ then spent some time at the 6th floor, playing n messing around, trying to get relaxed before we face our next paper. headed to McD for the 2nd round in the day for ice creamzzz, went shopping in the 'cold storage' =p=p bought lots of junkfood, and headed home!!!

end of the day~
cheers~~ =)

~ jess ~

Crush - David Archuleta

I hung up the phone tonight
Something happened for the first time
Deep inside it was a rush, what a rush

Cause the possibility
That you would ever feel the same way
About me, just too much, just too much

Why do I keep running from the truth?
All I ever think about is you
You got me hypnotized, so mesmerized
And I just got to know

Do you ever think when your all alone
All that we can be, where this thing can go?
Am I crazy or falling in love?
Is it really just another crush?

Do you catch a breath when I look at you?
Are you holding back like the way I do?
Cause I've tried and tried to walk away
But I know this crush ain't going away-ay-ay
Going away-ay-ay

Has it ever crossed your mind
When were hangin', spending time girl?
Are we just friends? Is there more? Is there more?

See it's a chance we've gotta take
Cause I believe that we can make this into
Something that will last, last forever, forever

Do you ever think when your all alone
All that we can be, where this thing can go?
Am I crazy or falling in love?
Is it really just another crush?

Do you catch a breath when I look at you?
Are you holding back like the way I do?
Cause I've tried and tried to walk away
But I know this crush ain't going away-ay-ay
Going away-ay-ay

Why do I keep running from the truth?
All I ever think about is you
You got me hypnotized, so mesmerized
And I just got to know

Do you ever think when your all alone
All that we can be, where this thing can go?
Am I crazy or falling in love?
Is it really just another crush?

Do you catch a breath when I look at you?
Are you holding back like the way I do?
Cause I've tried and tried to walk away
But I know this crush ain't going away-ay-ay
Going away-ay-ay

last min studies T-T

its 1am now, a new saturday.. lol.. and here i am again, holding up my eyelid, forcing it not to close, n staring at the same line for minutes.. the same old me, doing the last min works again.. arghh... should have made myself fully packed last time, i shouldnt have waste my time >.< im so sorry to my own self, im feel so bad for my eyes n my brain, they cant have a good rest becoz of me!! =p

well, im now studying macroeconomi, which appears to be the 1st paper on monday, and im still at the 10th page!!!! mamamiaaaa... its so boring... =( but i'll hav to force myself to love it.. >.< okay here goes, I LOVE IT (crossing fingers =p) hope i wont find myself sleeping on the table tml morning (i guess i wont, coz i'll go for the BED!) i miss the bed so much.. n oh my pillow... sniff sniff... i'll meet up with u guys later ( if I have the chance) hahahhaa..

okay for now, have to continue my study >.<
wish me luck =p

~ jess ~

a visit to orphanage with southern cross leos

mabel n I was invited to join the visit as guests =p and derrick arrived around 12pm to fetch me (luckily i prepared earlier =p) you wei and mabel were already in the car, and off we go to fetch max. gathered with the other leos and made some arrangements of the car. derrick parked his car at calvin's and we shifted to calvin's mom's car.

the next destination is a temple in puchong, have to move some supplies from there to the orphanage ( they moved those with a lorry! WOW!! ) ohya, there were 2 dogs in the temple, being locked up.. so sad.. there's a chocolate dog n a black n white dog, i like the choco doggy better =p but he's like wanting to go out, kept on looking outside, while the black n white doggy is veli.... geng in changing moods, he can be so frenly with u this moment, n the nex moment emo-ing at the corner.. lol... i bet its a SHE! hahahaha

back to the car, had some bumpy ride, after 30min or so, we reached kepong orphanage finally. =p removed the suppplies into the house, and thats when i saw the kids sleeping on the floor. with strangers passing here n there, n yet they're still sound asleep. i suppose that they're quite used to this kinda life? or its that its not their choices.. =( its very lucky of me to be given the chance to be with my family, and soon a few additional of family members?? =p

we went for chicken+duck rice for lunch, with 7 ppl ( 5 new frens). here's the list, calvin n his gf, max, chun wah, derrick, and the 2 old frens, mabel n you wei =) calvin's funny, his gf's quiet, max kept on 'wui~!' , chun wah wanted to eat 'tong sui' , derrick drinks without ice =p. hahahahaha..

went bak to calvin's place to get shifted back to derrick's car. have to wait at calvin's place for derrick to drop chun wah 1st, coz there's not enuff place >.< haha.. and with derrick's flying car skill, he manage to get back in a short time. =p then we headed back home~~ had a great time =)

~ jess ~

dun worry be happie =)

just got home and managed to finish bathing when i got a call from my fren. she's having problems in her relationship, n its already quite a long time.. yet they r still not stable.. this fren of mine had cried n cried so many times for this guy,when she cried in front of me, i really dunno what to do but try to drag her outta the sorrow.

she used to be a happie n cheerful gal, everytime making each of us laffing out loud, bringing happieness to us. but now, she's putting up a happie mask, n i dun like it... i feel like peeling off the fake mask of hers, dunwanna let her carry all the sorrows by herself, wanna be there for her, at least there'll be a pair of ears willing to be rented. im not good in relationships, so i dunno ways to solve, n i dun think my suggestions will be good.. so i shall remain quiet in front of her.

again, if its too sanfu, y not just let go? if he dont wanna appreciate u, u'll find another guy thts willing to do so. but if u insist to carry on, i'll support u.

so, my fren, im here ok?
dun worry be happie =)

a thought n a feeling

there was someone that i liked for quite a long time, but then it goes like this, like him, then forced myself not to like him, after that like him again, n this repeats again n again. he's a nice guy, treats everyone very friendly n kind n gentlemen n so on. talented, clever, smart, tall, know how to make others happy, wont go over the line, will be there to help with all his might, well manners, n a lot more.

but maybe im always scared n worried to take the closer step, so i never told him about anything about this, just treated him as a best friend. so turtle of me... lol.. and this is when i decided to let go. maybe its that he treats everyone as nice as he treats me(or even better), sumtimes it makes me jeolous =p but people says, friends are forever and couples or for a period or so.... so bless me to be good friends with him forever. =) cheers~

~ jess ~

mommy n daddy 520

Borrowed a dvd from a friend yesterday, titled as "money not enough 2", sounds familiar?? maybe its because that its in the cinemas lately... =)

lets see, its a singapore-made movie, but not bad in quality n moral. hahax. the plot is something like 3 sons who r supposed to take good care of their old mother, have gone feddup in taking care of her, and treat as if she's a burden and kicking her here and there, and they even let her to sleep in the KITCHEN FLOOR!!! curse them.. and when they tried to dump her in the old folks home, she fainted n was sent to the hospital. due to the large amount of hospital fee, they discussed and ended up to burn a 'fu' to let the mother pass away ( according to chinese believes, 'fu' is useful n treating souls n spirits). but at last they still cant manage to let it burn, it was just halfway then the brothers put off the fire with their palms. at the same time, a daughter of one of the brothers had an car accidEnt, which leads her to be in need for the same blood type as her grandma(the old mother), the mother of the daughter doesnt care of the brothers' intention to stop n took the only 2 packages of rare blood type away. the arguments among the brothers n the young mother had flowed into the old mother's ears, with disappointments and to save her granddaughter, she pulled out the tube ( the only thing that is keeping her alive) n died. =(


it appears to be a touching movie to me, which made me cried n cried n cried.. (not only me, so did my friends!! =p) in reality, people tend to forget ( or maybe purposely forget) to concern bout their parents, which raised us up till now, and yet still do in the future.

sacrifices made from parents are not all seen by us, maybe they wanted us not to feel bad? or not to get worried?

elements of happiness are around us, its up to our choice to grab hold of it anot. if u want it, grab it tightly and do not let go, once u let go, it'll get further n further from u, or u'll be lazier n lazier to held up ur hands to grab them, or u'll get too shy to get them, and so on.

lets ask ourself, how long had it been since you last hugged or kissed ur parents? to me, it was a very long time ago, when i was in the lower forms i guess. n how long had it been since u going out with your parents to pasar, or to accompany them to somewhere? hmmm...

well, just wanted to say, appreciate everything u've got. do not wait till the time they'd turned into a 'past tense' thn only u sit there n cry n say u're sorry n say u feel regretful.

~ jess ~

new phrase

i just got hold of a new phrase today, a phrase that could lead me to a 'scold people without using foul language' level (well its not like i use alot of foul words.. just a few minor ones =P)

"intellectually below average"

well, in pasar language, it simply means..
stupid
stupiak
stupak
bodoh
'ben dan'
'sha gua'
baka
n dot dot dot

so people, remember this phrase!! you can find it useful someday... =p


~ jess ~

cally's birthday

22nd of September, a day when cally was born~~ hahaha.. what a nice start~ well, as shown in the title, it's cally's birthday, n what as a friend can do for her is >>>> CELEBRATION!!!! hurray!!! now let me start from the very beginning of the day...

- 9am -
got off from house n reached segi, drove my car into the carpark, n that was when i remembered that i have to go casa (segi's hostel) instead of segi, i was like SHIT!!!SHOULD I REVERSE?? but i had already passed the guard house.. which means that i'll have to pay rm1 to get outta there and come back here at noon.. calculation comes in and.. the answer is i should just park my car inside segi XD then WALK to casa.. =(
process of walking to casa.. with the BIG HOT SUN on top of me, tanning every exposed skin of mine (which brings me darker n darker), then a call came in..

nick + ilex : r u on ur way here (casa) ??
jess : yes...
nick + ilex : look up!!!
jess looks up towards the eye soring sun... n c... NOTHING
nick + ilex laughing : we can see u!! can u see us??
jess looks up AGAIN but still ended up in NOTHING
nick + ilex laughing AGAIN
jess cuts the call n continued the walking process... walk walk walk walk walk... STOPPED, look up again to casa, n find NOTHING n continued to walk. (which made ilex n nick laughed again.. zzzz)

reached casa finally, escaped from the SUN n got to yion's unit. greeted, talked crap, made myself comfortable, n started off to work!!
together with nick, yion, jean n ilex, we boiled eggs, put the red red powder thingy, n yion made the egg red, who sacrificed her hands by touching the RED mixtures.. =) n while yion was reddening the eggs, nick jean n me WALKED to giant under the BURNING SUN to buy some steamboot materials. it was fun shopping with friends.. very different from me shopping with family, that's my comment of the trip to giant. XD bought things, paid n ciao.

got bak to yion's unit, dealing with those red red eggs, drawing our faces on those red red eggs, n took alot of pictures of the red red eggs =) i love the egg with my face on it so much!!! couldnt make myself to EAT it in the end.. ( friends commented that the face on the red egg looks alot like me lol)

then here comes the bad part, cally sms me n made me lied... i feel so bad =(
cally : where r u?
jess : at home, haven go out yet.
cally : i saw ur car in segi wor??
jess : hehehehhehee
cally : where r u???
jess : actually im in summit doing sumthing la. (when actually im in casa >.<)
- few min ltr -
cally : u're in summit where? im in summit liao
jess : im doing sumthing, later oni go find u la... ( i feel so bad T-T)
cally : ok la.. later eat lunch together
jess : okay

the thing that made me to lie was, the steamboot party is supposed to be a SURPRISE. i had told so much lies today.. T-T cally!!! itz all ur fault!!!! =P n ohya, the blindest lie = told by nick = my tyre punctured... LOL n that made cally worried so much!! NICK, U'RE SO BLACK HEARTED!!


- 12.30pm -
got back to segi, n meet up with cally separately. nick n me 1st, then oni ilez jean n yion=) we're so good in acting XD had lunch, talked, laughed, n off to class. time FLIES in class =D n class is finished. XD


- 4pm -
justin n victor were given responsibilities to guard n accompany cally =) well a few others went back to casa n prepare for steamboot~ meanwhile, cally n the gang played basketball to makan masa. =p which made cally abit unhappie, coz she miunderstood that playing basketball = celebrating her burfday n yet there was oni a few people =p =p

we prepared cincau, tomyam soup, ikan pilis soup, n the fishballs n foods while they were playing basketball downstairs. n got a sms by ilex which said that cally is already abit moody, n that made nick so HAPPY. XD his theory says : moody now n happy to tears later. LOL


- 7pm -
steamboot is READY!!!! practised the way to welcome cally ( to giv her a big surprise), and made us all 10+ people jump to the door side everytime the doorbell rang. LOL. n follows with dissapointments each time we open the door until the last time =p which cally finally turns up. n off we sang>> happy birthday songs with versions of eng, chinese, cantonese, malay n even a christmas song came up XD n that made cally cried!!!! HOHOHOHOHOHO

eugene came by =) coz he misunderstood the steamboot situation.. hahaha.. he tot it was in a restaurant, where it actually's in yion's unit =p

eat eat eat eat eat, rebut rebut rebut rebut, happy moments flies~ played the 'huh?? mat yeh??" game, n ties a tissue-ribbon on every losers hair.. i kena.. T-T when i thought i wont @.@ actually 80% of the participants kena.. so it isnt any big deal at all.. HAHAHAHA.. then we took out the champaign(dunno spelling correct anot) kekekke, n cally opened it with a POP outside the window. cups filled up, n people gather ina circle and.............. YUMMMMMMMMMMMMM SINGH!!!!!! hahahhahaha, we did that 3 times, n purposely called chelsie to 'chuan' XD. how lame of us.. XD after that we fInally take out the RED EGGS~~ ^^V n asked cally to guess which egg is who's.. hahaha.. n even scared her that if she guessed wrong of 5 among 17, she'll have to eat ALL the 30 eggs.. HAHAHAHAHHA yet mine was not a problem for her to guess AT ALL.. thx to nick.. zzzz

we video-ed up a 'speech' of cally, her views towards this surpised party, touchingness, friendshipness, happiness n so on. =p how i hope she cried at that moment.. >.< ( so bad of me=p)

then helped around to tidy up the place, which is already in a big mess, n ciao-ed HAHAHA end of the day~~~ lalalalla~~

had a great day!! n i hope cally did too!!! =D


Appreciate friendships that u own, appreciate what friends have done to make u happie, even if u're not really that happie, at least u know their effort. Friends are always there for each other, and never abandon any of them, not even if u have the chance to do so (which appears to be alot in life). FRIENDSHIPS 4EVA!!

~ jess ~

death??

Minutes ago, a good friend of mine asked me through messenger, a shocking yet will-be-a-fact question, why would someone speak of these questions? i wonder..

{ Conversation }

friend : IF one day i died, will you come to my funeral? no matter where r u, what r u doing..

me : sure i'll go, but i need someone to inform me la..


come to think of it, how many of my so-called friends will come to mine? i doubt that most of us will still be in contact.. or some will just remember who am i when they're reviewing their contact list.. hmmm.. but im sure that there'll be friends n relatives n family who will turn up?? gosh.. y am i cursing myself..?? @.@

well, with me being just a teenager, i still cant imagine the day comes to me. when will it come?? how will it come? god knows.. what i see from movies n books, people tend to have flashbacks at the moments of their death.. but with only seconds to hold, could it possibly be enough?? wouldnt FEAR take place instead og memories?? hmmmmm.... who knows?

but IF, i really can manage to revise all my memories, which scene will appear before me?? me being with my family? or me hanging out with my friends? or time spent with my beloved spikey? or things that i've done wrong? or things that i had wished to be done but in the end not-done?

conclusion = do what i have to do now!!! have no regrets!!! go for the thing i wished for!! go get it!! yeah!! =D